A Dakini, the
kind in human form, is roughly equivalent to the Muse of
Western stories. She inspires the male,
taking him to the full expression of himself in the world.
The Daka, a male muse serves this same purpose for women.
in question has obstacles to the expression of his Highest
Self, and releasing these pretty much always involves revisiting
the trauma that originally set the resistance in place. This
is catharsis, the intense and complete experiencing of emotion
that has long been contained, resisted, bottled up. In most
stories of Muses, they seem willful, capricious, in a word,
- trouble. They use the full range of manipulative tools
and shock tactics that wives do. Wicked. The difference is
this: A girlfriend, or wife, in the normal pattern (archetype)
of things is motivated by her ego-view, which sometimes includes
the awareness that "her man" living his excellence
can benefit her. More often though, his flowering will be
taken by her as a threat. A Dakini has one purpose - man's
spiritual advancement, from wherever he is to wherever he
can go with her support. She is operating consciously with
Love, and all the leverage that affords, to pry apart your
defences, smash your ego and put Truth as close in front
of you as possible, that you might wake up to your purpose,
The nearest modern profession to this is a "Life Coach".
That's really what a Dakini is. She's an emissary of the
divine, to tempt you to your divinity, to experiencing the
real fruits of existence.
A Dakini can be loved, adored, worshipped, in fact, that's
essential - but she can never be owned. No artist,
no poet would dare expect his Muse to be permanently available,
or in any way exclusive, to him. They do what they do, live
as they live so that they may serve existence in this way.
Any restriction on their freedom, their flowering is a restriction
on their usefulness to existence. Another way to express
this is to say that they are already married - to The Divine.
The work of a Daka, a male Tantra Practitioner is usually
with a Dakini who is awakening to her path. He provides
a base of unconditional love and devotion (to her truth,
not her mind) which encourages the woman to her flowering.
He shows her, through her direct experience, that intimacy,
love and bliss are not rare, scarce, unattainable or dependant
on someone else. They are there within her, waiting to be
claimed - her birthright.
Dakinis and Dakas are those who know, at their deepest level,
that this is their calling, their vocation. The commitment
required is not "great" or "huge", it's total. Every aspect
of being is involved. To work effectively with Tantra, an
impeccable mind, a healthy body, an open
heart and a significant degree of spiritual awareness are
So, for Dakinis, diet, exercise, meditation and some form
of energy work are important. Dakinis work on themselves,
their bodies and minds using Yoga, Tai-Chi, and practicing
various arts along with lots of silent sitting
The Buddha's injunction to practice "right livelihood" is
also important. Being involved in a business that profits
from, or causes, damage to the earth is not compatible
with tantric practice. Niether is being involved with any
enterprise that derrogtes the Goddess, or any aspect of
the Divine Feminine. These are not "rules", they are simply
facts. Keeping the heart open and loving is essential to
working with sacred sexuality. The heart can't be open when
you're doing that which offends it.
The judgements of the surrounding culture also have to be
faced. Many people focus on the sexual aspects of the work
and reckon that "Dakini" is synonymous with "whore". Mainstream
religions have done an effective job of convincing people
that sex is inherintly sinful, and this judgement has infected
even non-semitic religions. There is, for example, a Yoga
teacher in Johannesburg who objects to this school charging
money for tantric work. She would never think of charging
money for the tantra work she attempts - just she also wouldn't
think of doing it with anyone but a long-term attendee of
her remarakbly expensive yoga classes.
So a Tantrika, Dakini or Daka, has to face the same cultural
judgements as a sex worker, possibly, and oh so wrongly,
the same legal sanctions too. She has to make a living from
her healing work, or supplement it with something compatible
with her ethics/aesthetics. Maintaining her body, mind and
spirit is a full time job, whether she has one client a month,
or a dozen. Her lovers (outside of her healing work) are
limited to those who have transcended jealousy, or are at
least willing to take a stand against it in themselves. It
really is a miracle that there are people in the world that
are willing and able to do this work. It's not surprising
that they are rare. Appreciate them.